40% Bagel

Being a stay at home mom is hard. I often feel completely unproductive because the results of raising a child are Long Term and not always visible day to day. This is the absolute best, easiest, and hardest job I have ever had.

I am completely responsible for a mostly dependent human life, you guys!

It’s sometimes easy to forget how to be a grown up. As a Parent I have to BE A RESPONSIBLE ADULT All the Time. But it’s hard to also actively be the kind of adult I was in my 20s and early 30s.

Today, however, I wanted to share my morning productivity.


Today I have

  • Made coffee
  • Done Pilates (Beginner Mat Workout)
  • Showered
  • Kept my son safe and moderately entertained
  • Fed the Dog Twice
  • Fed myself. And my kid!
  • Got my kid down for his nap
  • Pin Curled my hair
  • Made a cup of tea
  • Made a real sandwich
  • And I made a batch of Bagels for the first time in my life


(If you go by my pregnancy diet…my son is 40% bagel. Carbs were the main thing I could eat without feeling totally sick for the first few months he was in utero.)

This afternoon I will:

  1. Eat all the Bagels (well on my way to this goal)
  2. Vacuum (haven’t done this yet)
  3. Make Macarons! (another first!)


On Competition, and How I Just Don’t Give a Shit

I spent the first part of my weekend in a very bad mood.

My upset stemmed greatly from a problem I keep encountering in owning a small business: Others have a sort of possessiveness in which they want to project themselves into the running of my business. While I won’t go into the details of the first half of my frustration, as it’s something I am still trying to work out, I must bring up the latter half of my issue.

While it has been a present topic my entire career, it has been of late a very constant pressure:


The False Conception of Competition in My Field


The thing is, I don’t give a damn about competition. I was never good at sports and I barely passed the debate section of my high school English class. And when it comes to people who help other people, I just don’t see how there can be too many. There will never be too many authors. There will never be too many massage therapists.


I work in a very small town and have always been very disappointed in the limited presence of other MTs there. I came most recently from a large city where I worked in a clinic which employed around 40 therapists, and was located down the street from about fifty other clinics, spas, and other healing arts centers. Overall, I still had plenty of work. There is always a need for other members of my profession. Even in a seemingly minuscule town in rural Pennsylvania, three MTs is never enough.


I can’t seem to find an origin for the following. I found it on Pinterest, and a google search has done nothing to turn up its origin. I hope I can attribute it to someone, as the concept has a huge impact on everything I do at work and in life, and I think it’s really important to mention here:


“I’m not interested in competing with anyone. I hope we all make it.”


The truth is, that I actually get a little upset when people inform me that I have competition in my field.  Not because I think that I do, but because other people don’t understand.  This is not something that needs to exist in healing.

I don’t have competitors. I have colleagues. That’s what we are and that’s what we should be and that’s how I wish people viewed us all!

I might not be the perfect match for a client, and that’s ok. But without other options for a therapist in town, that person will probably go without the care they need, and that’s not fair. And to pretend that someone else doesn’t exist because it means less clients for me? That’s wrong beyond all wrongness.

On top of that, hey, you know what? I like getting massages, too. I can’t give myself a deep tissue massage. It’s IMPOSSIBLE. I need other therapists in town, for my own sake.


I am very well trained in my area. But there are so many other modalities and styles of massage and bodywork that I am not trained in, not skilled at, or don’t want to do. When a client comes in with a particular need, I will not lie to them and say I know how to ‘fix’ them or their problem. I can’t do that to the client nor to my profession. It’s dishonest and unfair. I must have other resources – other therapists to whom I can refer my clients when there is nothing more I can do for them. This goes as well for when I can’t work. If I’m out of town, sick, fully booked. I need a list of therapists whose names and numbers I can give to my clients and potential clients. If another therapist comes to the shop where I rent my studio space I want them to be able to leave a stack of cards so that others might find them when they are in need! I’m not afraid of competition! Because I do not believe that is what we have between us.

My only competition is myself.


I do not own my clients. No one can steal what I do not own. It’s unfair to the clients and the other therapists to accuse them of somehow stealing my livelihood. I won’t ever do this.


In conclusion:


Please give your support to all members of the wellness community! The greatest concern we should all have is that each client, potential client, and former client is getting the care they need!


%d bloggers like this: